Mr. Ian M. Belcurry

My name is Brian McElmurry. I like literature and skateboarding. My novella Rocket Man was recently published as an Ebook by Thought Catalog

yellow slappy curbs are calling me

On the way to therapy I drove past a group of young college kids in front of an art institute building, all dressed in black, as if for some performance. I thought one of them was Steve Roggenbuck, and kept looking back, thinking, “that hair, it could be him.”
I googled his twitter while I waited for my therapist and it wouldn’t load quick enough because I have too many pictures on my iphone.
In therapy, I felt even more depressed as we spoke of my depression and negative cognition, and how I need to take care of myself and not tell myself such horrible things and ways I can be happier and live a better life.
At home I got in bed and read some thought catalog, Clair Mott, and then googled Steve Roggenbuck’s twitter and he had no mention of being in Denver.
I thought it would be cool to see him read or perform with whomever whatever.
I missed him here once because I didn’t have a smart phone or home Internet at the time.
When I type words, I feel less depressed, but feel all I can share is my depression but want to share more and have ideas but get down and second guess myself when I sit down to finalize an essay, or submit something, and I know because I’m depressed my perception is skewed and maybe tomorrow I can not be so down about myself.
I want to start skateboarding again, but my thigh muscle hurts and aches because I pulled it 2 years ago, and that is my negative cognition, when in reality if I do certain physical therapy things and strengthen muscles, I can skateboard and be cool, but need to do that.
I skateboarded to the store a month ago, when the snow melted.
I love sidewalk surfing and the yellow slappy curbs are calling me.
The dog is happy, at least

Lunch break despair like an English man (quiet despair) (kind of poem)

Wanted to
Take a nap on my lunch break
But I read something on vice.com
Instead
Abt skateboarding

Googled Mira Gonzalez twitter and read
That
I like her twitter

She’s like a Greek
Myth of sandal flier that’s wax wing shoes melt, prior to melt, or something

She had a picture of an attractive woman in a hobarts shirt, but without a head, and I wondered who this is, but think its … Mira, idk

I don’t have Facebook or twitter because I have low self-esteem and would wish ppl would like care, but its like I post to a void and I feel like I don’t matter, even more than normal.

Money is important.

When rich ppl suicide I don’t understand but money doesn’t buy happiness, it just buys time and luxury.

Time and luxury I wish I had but I’ve basically just been eating hash chocolate and drinking good beer and then kind of remembering sex and waking up naked at 2 in morning, or doing things I have to do, or napping.

Yesterday we took the dog to the park, and we got him groomed on Saturday, and he is the best cutie puperino.

My lunch break is almost over and I didn’t nap, it’s
Monday
I forsee a life of debt, paid and then added to
There’s Sunday afternoons
Like the song cruising on a Sunday afternoon, but…
I need to fucking make changes and edit and send in novel and type up essay I wrote and submit to TC, but feel like giving up, not in cool way, but like lame way.

I’m not going to though

The woman selling tamales out of her car by the grocery store said, “You look tired.” Really saying I looked stoned. I went, “uh… I’m not tired.” And she gave me the half-dozen pork tamales. They were delicious.

The dog just stole the pen I was writing with when I went to go get more coffee. He had it behind the couch and I tried to “trade” it with him via treat, but he wasn’t having it and continued chewing it and ran into the bedroom and under the bed. There was a point I thought the pen may had hurt him, as he ran with it between small spaces but he was fine. I felt like crying mildly. I got it from him, once I moved the bed, and he had destroyed the tip completely, making it un-usable.

pantheraj:


"HELLO INFANT I AM BELUGA WHALE"

"YOU ALSO ARE BALD AND HAVE A BULBOUS FOREHEAD. LET US BE FRIENDS FORTHWITH."

pantheraj:

"HELLO INFANT I AM BELUGA WHALE"

"YOU ALSO ARE BALD AND HAVE A BULBOUS FOREHEAD. LET US BE FRIENDS FORTHWITH."

(via sweetinspiration-sv)